Well, really!

Lesson 1: The Fork

There's a wonderful book called 'The House on Beartown Road', by Elizabeth Cohen. Moving, funny, well observed, it describes a year in which Ms Cohen is bringing up her baby daughter Ava while also looking after her 80-year-old father, who has Alzheimer’s. Anyone who's been close to someone with a declining memory will especially appreciate it.

She realizes the symmetry of the situation: that Ava is learning about the world as her grandfather forgets. The two of them make a great team.

"Now he can't remember the name of a fork. Yet here is the thing: he knows the difference between a good fork and a bad one. Once I remind him that a fork is a fork, he wants me to know right away that he doesn't find the fork I have handed him a very nice fork. He is right. The forks we use have plastic handles. They are cheap.

"This is important to him, that I recognise his good taste. Once I remind him how to use a fork, a spoon, a napkin, the location of the arms in his jacket, he is instantly an expert. He decides that he will pass on the knowledge, as well as the power of discriminating. The person he has decided to pass these on to is Ava. He will demonstrate good fork manners to a baby who is still struggling with fork usage. He will teach her. So every day now he sits beside her; she shows him which utensil is the fork, and then he shows her the right way to use it."

All of which is by way of introduction to a story in the Daily Mail [actually a couple of weeks ago] that children in at least one school are to attend lessons in how to use a fork.

"A primary school is employing a member of staff solely to teach pupils how to use a knife and fork. Teachers have noticed many children having trouble using cutlery at school mealtimes. They believe someone needs to teach them the skills they may be missing out on at home. Children aged four to 11 will also be shown how to socialise with other pupils while sitting at the table and to choose healthy foods at Burrowmoor School in March, Cambridgeshire."

Well, really!

Caring Council, Eventually

Good news from Cheltenham, where the council has changed its mind and will now pay for an 89-year-old couple – who have been married for 65 years – to live together in a care home. Last summer Gloucestershire County Council decided that Mr Richard Driscoll was eligible for a subsidised place in a care home in Cheltenham, but his wife Beryl was not, despite being blind and registered disabled. Mr Driscoll can't walk unaided and used to rely on his wife to help him around the house.

However good the professional care in their new home, and I'm sure it will be, it won't be as valuable as their care for each other. In spite of their difficulties, she will be his support, he will be her eyes. It's what happens when you've lived together for 65 years.

According to the BBC, a Council spokesperson said: "Mrs Driscoll's needs and wishes have changed since Social Services initially assessed her." Er, yes. Still, it worked out in the end.